It’s a special week for Radio 2000 presenter and ‘Raising Babies’ host Carol Ofori and her husband Greg as they celebrated their sixth wedding anniversary on Women’s Day 9 August. Naturally, a relationship is full of ups and downs and it’s important to be willing to put in the work to make love last. So, as she celebrates this milestone, Carol shares six tips that she has learned during her marriage which she hopes can help others in their journey of love. “Being married has been such a beautiful and special time. I have learned so much in the six years since I changed my last name from Ralefeta to Ofori,” Carol says. “The transition was relatively smooth and I really attribute this to good communication between the two of us and great pre-marital counselling and workshops.”
Communication Is Key
This goes without saying but communication is something that is so important in a relationship. Talking, laughing and sharing is the key to nurturing your relationship and the more you talk about EVERYTHING honestly the closer you get to each other.
Make Each Other Your Number One
Your partner should be your number one above all humans but NOT above God. Your partner should always be your first consideration in all that you do. Your partner should even be above your kids because for the kids to be happy, mom and dad have got to be happy first.
Support Is So Important
Your friends and family are so key to your marriage’s success. Keep friends who want your marriage to win close and marry into a family that is for your marriage to begin with. That way you have them to lean on when times are tough. You can’t go into a marriage without the support of God and each other’s family.
Investing In Your Marriage Is Key
You can invest in your marriage in a variety of different ways. Praying and fellowship together is an investment, making time for dates and intimacy draws you closer and going for counselling when times are tough and attending marriage workshops where necessary is key. Put in as much work as you would put in for your monthly cheque and you should be good. Many people expect to have fruitful relationships but put zero to little work put in. Just like you study and do workshops to better your career, you should do the same for your marriage.
Date Nights Are Vital
Date nights are important for catch ups. Even though you may live in the same house, you actually could miss so much in each other’s lives – especially if you have children. Make time for a date – even if its coffee on the balcony with no kids for a few hours. Use this time to catch up on the each other’s lives. Asking a simple question like “How are you?” can reveal so much.
Ask Uncomfortable Questions At Comfortable Times
This is so important. Ask questions that may feel uncomfortable but choose the right time to ask them. Some examples include “Are you happy my love?”, “Is your job fulfilling you?”, “Sexually are you fulfilled or could we do more?”, “How are you feeling emotionally about life?” These are uncomfortable questions but, if asked in the right setting with the right loving tone, they can yield so many benefits to growing as a couple and not moving like two ships in the night.”
As she celebrates another year of marriage, Carol and Greg have made an effort to continue putting in the hard work and never getting complaisant with each other. “Marriage is an incredible union – however many pin this journey on the white dress, fancy cake and tailored suit, but it is way more complicated than that,” Carol says. “The coming together of two different people, with two different personalities, can be challenging. We did wait six years before tying the knot and I do believe that those six years really helped us understand each other very well. Had we gotten married any sooner, I don’t not believe that our marriage would have lasted. Gods timing on our union was clear. I look forward to another 600 more years with my forever man.”